i am like wet socks:

bothersome, hard to take off, and something else, but i forgot the last adjective.













































Sometimes I get confident and think it’s ok to just be me.
That it could be like in the movies where the neat boy
Likes the crazy girl
And gives her the peace of mind she deserves.

But other times I think I should control myself
So I can keep you near.

work

clearly, you have no idea
just how hard it is to concentrate.

and just how much i want you to love me back.

letting you in

You should know why I hate silence so much. Why I fear it. Why it can’t happen.












At any time you could leave me, just like all the rest.
Was it something I did?
I won’t do it again; I didn’t know.
Just give me the chance I deserve. The chance I need.
(And it's not because I don't trust you; it's because I don't trust me.)

this keeps weighing on my mind

i'm giving you all that i can
because i want your love.

poem

1. love me for speaking
2. fix me dinner
3. tell me what to do
4. don’t think it’s just you
5. make a new mix tape
6. photograph in black and white
7. make little sense
8. join the art community (how do i member myself? i probably should get some sort of vintage outfit)
9. you already inspired me
10. job? mop floors
11. sing a song; i’ve been told i prefer male musicians, and that that is not feminist
12. drama
13. i’d prefer to be craft-sy
14. and name my children hoakey italian names like giuseppe
15. i don’t know why everybody hates that name so much; i quite prefer it
16. open up that cookbook, rachel
17. for god’s sake, do something
18. living on impulse sounds too hard,
19. apparently i’m a good actress
20. i really do prefer wearing skirts
21. tell me a story
22. pretty please
23. l’incontro fortuito
24. i wish school would start so i could talk to my counselor who is also italian
25. make me live in your ideals.

i can promise you i was there

I wake every morning, and think of you.
Which makes me smile, until I remember:
I’m the last thing on your mind.

If I tell you this, you will run away.
But I can’t not tell you and I can’t not have you:

_______________.












































please stay.
and don't leave.

BPD

new work, in the midst of being diagnosed with a psychological disorder.

realizing what i've done with my past and how my future will change.